Why Do Women Lose Interest in Me? (This Kills Attraction Instantly)
By Dan Bacon, founder of Master Attraction
This one mistake makes a woman instantly lose interest and most guys don't even realize that they're doing it.
If a guy does realize that he's making this mistake, he'll usually hope that the woman will just forgive him for it, but women don't.
With this particular mistake, you can be quite confident, you can dress well and be having a good interaction with a woman, and she will still lose attraction for you and lose interest because of this.
The mistake is seeking validation.
I'm going to give you examples of what guys say and do to seek validation from women in a way that causes the woman to instantly lose attraction.
I'm also going to explain what you need to say and do instead.
So seeking validation can be based on how you're talking to the woman.
It can be based on what you're saying.
It can be based on you trying very hard to impress her to hopefully be then validated that she likes you back.
It can also be that you're reacting to her in a way that shows her and makes it clear to her that you need a positive response from her in order to feel good about yourself.
You're seeking that when you're interacting with her.
You're not going to feel confident or good about yourself if she isn't giving you that.
You need that from her and women pick up on that and it turns them off.
So here's a very obvious example.
A guy is on a date with a woman and he then asks something like, how am I doing so far, where he is obviously seeking validation from her.
Or another example is when he essentially asks for validation of the choice that he is making rather than not being afraid to just decide and take the lead.
So he would say something like, um, I was thinking we could sit over there unless you'd rather sit somewhere else.
Rather than just saying, yeah cool let's sit over here this looks good, or okay let's sit over here, or just walking over and choosing a place to sit and she then follows along.
An extreme example in which he also displays some wimpy insecure body language is when he says something like, oh are you having fun, um I just want to make sure I'm not boring you.
So in that case he's looking for reassurance.
He's seeking validation from her that he's not boring her, that she's having fun.
He needs a positive response from her to feel good about himself.
If she were to say, which most women aren't going to say, but if she said no I'm feeling bored and I'm not enjoying myself, then his whole world's going to come crumbling down.
He's going to suddenly be all over the place emotionally.
He's going to be nervous.
He's going to be panicking, worried about losing her interest.
It's going to be a huge deal for him.
A guy who doesn't seek validation from a woman, who doesn't need to seek validation in order to feel good about himself, will be able to say something like this:
"This place has a great vibe. I like it."
He's confident enough to express himself and say what he feels.
He doesn't even need to ask her what she thinks.
So if he were to ask her what she thinks, it's different.
It changes it a bit.
"This place has a great vibe. I like it. What do you think?"
Give me validation.
Make me feel good about myself.
There's that in there, even though it's subtle.
A guy can be confident and not seeking validation and ask her the question because he just feels like asking her the question.
It really depends on how he says it, and that's what women pick up on.
"This place has a great vibe. I like it. How about you? What do you think?"
In that case, he's just having a conversation with her about it.
He's asking her what she thinks, and that's okay.
It's when it's said in a way where he's seeking that validation from her, of, what I just said is good, right?
"This place has a great vibe. I like it. What do you think?"
It completely changed it, right?
It's the same words but it's said in a different way.
It's said with a different intention.
What's going on behind the words, right?
The intention behind it, the feeling inside of the man is different, and that's what women are paying attention to.
Another example of seeking validation is when a man is about to talk about his interests, or a hobby, or something that he likes.
When he starts talking about it to the woman, he begins by saying something like, oh you probably think it's lame but, or you probably think it's stupid, or you might think it's weird.
Or he might say that you probably won't think it's cool but, and then he says it.
He's seeking validation from her that, no, no it is cool, no it's not lame, that sort of thing.
He's hoping for that sort of pat on the back reassurance.
This is what really confuses a lot of guys out there when it comes to women.
They will have heard advice like, oh just be yourself.
For the guy, he is being himself and not realizing that he's making all these subtle mistakes that are turning women off.
People are saying to him, just be yourself, yeah yeah just be yourself and uh, you'll attract the right type of girls who are right for you.
He talks to a woman that he finds attractive.
He makes these types of subtle mistakes and women don't find him attractive.
He walks away thinking, well women like that may just not like my physical appearance and I have no chance with women like that, so I have to accept women that I'm not even attracted to, for example.
Another way that a guy will be seeking validation that a woman will pick up on is based on his body language.
His body language is too stiff and he's standing or sitting as still as possible, trying to not make the wrong move with his body language.
So he might be sort of, you know, very stiff and very worried and trying to look as perfect as possible to hopefully then have the woman like him and validate him that he is doing his body language right.
Yet what he doesn't understand is that when you get the mindset right, when you get your way of thinking right, when you're actually thinking in a confident way, then your body language automatically starts to relax without you having to focus on it.
You don't have to try to have the perfect body language and sit in the right way, put your arms in the right way, I've got to sit this way, I've got to sit that way and try to look alpha and tough and so forth.
What women really find attractive is when you're not afraid and you're not seeking validation with your body language.
As a result, your body language automatically starts to look cool, confident, easygoing, self-assured, and that is attractive to women.
Whereas if a guy is seeking validation with how he's sitting or standing, he's trying to stand in the right way or sit in a way that makes the woman like him, she can pick up on that.
She senses it.
She picks up on the subtleties of his body language.
That he's afraid.
That he is putting on an act.
That he needs validation from her in terms of her showing more interest in him because he's sitting in that way for him to feel good enough.
Another example is where a guy will change his answer to something or soften his stance on something, his opinion on something, if she happens to disagree.
So he'll say something, and then she doesn't agree, and he'll say something like, yeah I mean I only thought that once, or I don't really care that much about it, or I mean yeah you're probably right sort of thing.
I mean it's not something that I really believe in or think or like or whatever it may be.
He will change his stance in the moment or soften his stance and try to be more like her.
He doesn't realize that you don't have to be the same as a woman and have everything in common with her in order to have sex or a relationship with her.
You can be opposites in many ways and as long as you're making her feel attracted, then she's going to want you.
Women want to feel attraction above everything else, and that is created when you're interacting with her.
By the way, before I give you a final point, I'll mention that if you don't know, I run the Master Attraction community.
That's where guys are learning my techniques.
They're learning exactly what to say and do to make women feel sexually and romantically attracted to them.
The guys who are applying what they're learning are getting amazing results.
This is life-changing stuff.
So I'll read out a few success stories to show you what I mean.
This member, and this particular girl is his girlfriend now, he met an absolute ten.
She walked through the door and, you know, everyone was looking at her.
She's the type of woman that every guy really wants, where she's feminine.
For him, it was important for him that she doesn't drink and she's healthy.
That was important to him.
Her and her friends loved him and he ended up FaceTiming her.
They ended up dating.
They got into a relationship.
Another member used the technique that I teach in the first lesson.
This changes everything.
It makes you confident around women that you find attractive to the point where they feel magnetically attracted to you.
This member is just one of so many that have given this type of success story, that have experienced this.
The beautiful women there seem to seek his presence.
They literally start to feel gravitated towards you, or they're looking at you, and if you walk over and talk to them, they're interested.
They're already feeling attracted to you based on this.
He got the bar girl's number and left the place with the dance teacher.
So that was a good night for him.
Another member slept with four girls in the last four days.
A lot of guys don't think that that would be possible because a lot of guys think that it's difficult to attract women.
They think they can't even get one woman to want them sexually, so how could they get four women to want them sexually.
That just seems impossible.
When you actually know how to attract women, they feel attracted to you.
You see it and you just move things forward and you get a result.
It's just so simple.
That's how the naturals do it, and that's how I did it when I was sleeping with lots of women.
I've settled down now, but I now teach the members of the Master Attraction Community, and they're getting amazing results when they apply the advice.
I'll read out one more.
This member got a number of a younger woman at the gym.
The type of woman that most men will only ever look at.
They won't actually walk over and talk to.
That's the reality that you discover when you actually walk over and talk to women.
They're almost always flattered and amazed that a normal, confident guy has come over to talk to them.
He isn't being weird, isn't being sleazy, or trying hard to pick them up, or anything like that.
Instead, he's actually making them feel attracted, and the woman then wants something to happen.
This particular member got a number from the girl in the gym, and he wasn't dressed well.
He said he was a bit disheveled in his appearance, and it just didn't matter.
He still got her number anyway.
So a final point to help you regarding seeking validation and not seeking validation is that women are attracted to men who feel like they're already good enough.
If you're not seeking validation, a woman gets that sense from you.
If, as you are talking to her, she can sense that you're seeking her validation, seeking her approval, trying to get a read of, am I good enough, and giving her those sorts of signals, she will literally lose attraction for you.
There are so many reasons why.
The fundamental reason is that women are not attracted to emotional weakness in men.
One of the other reasons is that if a man is the sort of man who seeks validation from others, then it suggests that he's not a confident man that other men are going to look up to and respect, and other people in general.
So how is that then going to play out when he meets her family and friends?
Are they going to respect him and look up to him?
Is she going to be able to look up to him and respect him in a relationship?
If she can't, then she's not going to be able to maintain her feelings of sexual attraction for him.
She's not going to be able to respect him.
Therefore, she's never truly going to love him.
That's not the outcome that a woman wants in her relationship with a man.
She wants to be able to look up to him and respect him.
She wants to be able to feel attracted based on his non-physical traits: his confidence, his self-belief, his social intelligence, his emotional intelligence.
All these sorts of non-physical traits that are so important to women.
She wants to be able to feel attracted to that and continue to respect him because of that.
Appreciate him because of that.
Feel safe with him because of that, because he's able to handle himself in this world.
As a result of that, she continues to love him.
She falls in love with him and continues to love him because he is a man who gives her the type of feeling that she is looking for.
She gets to feel that respect for him.
She gets to feel attracted.
It's so difficult for a woman to be able to find that in a man long term.
A lot of men are able to be initially a bit confident when they meet a woman, but then they become insecure in a relationship.
It turns into a very difficult situation for the woman where she's trying to get rid of him, and he's being clingy and so forth, and she just doesn't want it.
So when a woman meets a man and gets a sense of, oh right he's not seeking validation, he's actually emotionally independent, he's actually truly confident, her eyes light up.
Her attraction switches on and she opens up.
She wants something to happen.
If you're talking to a woman and she gets a sense in the subtleties of your body language, your energy, your behavior, that you're seeking her validation, you're seeking her approval, she will instantly lose attraction for you.
It doesn't matter how well you've dressed.
It doesn't matter how cool your hairstyle is.
It doesn't matter what you're doing for a living.
She will instantly lose attraction for you.
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