What Am I Doing Wrong With Women? (It’s One Simple Mistake Most Guys Make)
By Dan Bacon, founder of Master Attraction
So many men waste years or decades of their life making one of the two mistakes that I'm going to talk about in this video.
Yet, some guys eventually figure it out.
They figure out where they've been going wrong with women.
They then correct it with a simple adjustment that I'll explain in this video, and everything starts to improve.
They start to get the results that they want with women.
But other guys continue on throughout their entire life and never figure this out.
So I want to fix this for you today and save you all of that time and help you start to get the results that you want with women.
The two types of guys, who I'm guessing you're going to be one of, are the Passive Man or the Pick Me Man.
The main mistake that the Passive Man makes is that he just expects that he should get results with women without really doing anything to make something happen.
One of the reasons why is that a Passive Man is often a man who has some value.
He may look at himself as being a cool guy.
Or he may be intelligent.
Or he may be disciplined and work out.
Or he may have a good job.
Or he just sees himself as being a valuable man.
He knows that he's not a loser or a man who women just aren't going to be interested in.
But there's a mistake that he'll make when he's single and in a relationship, and that is to be passive.
So when single, for example, he will interact with a woman who's working as a cashier.
He finds her attractive, and he just interacts with her and doesn't try to make anything happen.
In his mind, he really should be attractive enough for the woman, so he doesn't really have to do anything other than exist, and she should want him.
He really thinks that women should be trying to make something happen with him.
But they don't.
There are a number of reasons why, but essentially it comes down to the fact that women are not wired to be the ones who are actively pursuing.
Women are not wired to say to themselves, “All right, well that guy looks good. Walk over and talk to him. Hey, how's it going? What's your name? You got a girlfriend? Maybe I can get your number and take you out sometime.”
Women are not wired to pursue men in that way.
When I say wired, I mean physically wired.
The area of the brain that is dedicated to sexual pursuit is 2.5 times larger in a male's brain compared to a female's.
Additionally, men have a lot of testosterone in their body compared to women.
Women have a very low level of testosterone.
It was found that when women went on testosterone treatment, they then started to masturbate more and they wanted to have more sex.
But the solution to the problem isn't to get women out there to get on testosterone and that's going to make women start chasing men.
Because when women get on testosterone, it starts to make them more masculine.
So if you see women who have been doing testosterone as a result of bodybuilding, they'll often end up looking quite masculine.
Women are not wired in the same way that men are.
When it comes to the human mating dance — the male and female — it is the man who has to be active, who has to make something happen rather than being passive and waiting for the woman to guide him through the process.
The Passive Man will often make the mistake for years, where for example, he is working on his career, he's working out in the gym, he's wearing better clothes, he's moved to a better apartment or house, he's got an investment property now, he's got a great car.
He's doing all these things to increase his value as a man.
Which is increasing his value on paper, sure.
But at the end of the day, when he interacts with a woman, his value isn't going to do the job for him.
Where a woman is going to say, “Hang on, you dress well, and you seem to have been working out, and I'm getting the sense that you might have an investment property or you might live in a cool apartment. So I tell you what, give me your number and I'll take you out.”
It's just not going to happen.
Instead, if he interacts with a female cashier or he's talking to a woman in a bar, she can get a sense about him that, “Oh yeah, he seems like quite a valuable guy.”
But at the end of the day, in almost all cases, she's still going to wait for him to move things forward.
If he doesn't, she would usually rather go without.
One of the reasons for that is that most women know that a man will have sex with them if they open up to it.
It's very easy for women to get sex.
So they want to know that the guy is actually interested in them enough to make something happen, rather than just having sex with a man who doesn't even really like them.
She wants to see that he actually has that type of interest in her.
But she also wants to see that he is comfortable taking on the natural male role in the human mating dance.
It's not necessarily just a traditional thing where the man pursues a woman or goes after a woman or courts a woman or starts talking to a woman and moves things forward.
It's not just tradition.
It's built into nature.
Women are not wired to be the ones who go after it and make it happen.
“Hey, give me your number. Let me take you out sometime.”
It's just not the way that women are wired.
So a guy who's being passive — regardless of whether he hasn't achieved anything in life or he's achieved a lot of things in life — needs to make one simple adjustment.
And that is to take the next step.
To actually move things forward.
That's how, for example, guys who are in school, university, working a casual job, part-time job, low-paying full-time job — they're just figuring out life — are able to get themselves a girlfriend.
Because they take that next step.
They're able to get a result by taking on the active role rather than being passive.
The active role is moving things forward and giving themselves a chance, even though they haven't achieved much or anything in life and may never become successful.
Rather than just expecting to get results with women, they make something happen.
A guy who's already achieved a lot of things in life — great.
He's got some value in that regard.
But in almost all cases, women are not going to take that step for him unless the woman is unattractive.
Or if the guy is really successful and she's a gold-digger sort of thing.
She might take that step.
But in all other cases, even if a woman does feel attracted to you when you're interacting with her — if she's a cashier, or you're at a bar, or you're talking to women through your social circle — she's not going to take that next step for you.
She may find you attractive.
She may find you appealing.
But she still wants you to be able to take that next step.
Now the second type of man is the Pick Me Man.
The main mistake that the Pick Me Man makes is that, unlike the Passive Man who really doesn't do anything and is just expecting results to happen for some reason, the Pick Me Man seems to be hoping to be chosen by women.
They can see it based on his body language.
They can sense it based on his energy.
They can sense that he's hoping to be picked.
He's hoping that women are going to like him.
There are different levels to this.
Sometimes a guy is a Pick Me Man where he's really desperate.
For example, he's walking through a shopping mall and he's sort of looking at women and hoping that they pick him.
It's really obvious that he is hoping that women give him choosing signals.
He walks into a bar and he's hoping that women are going to notice him and pick him.
Another part of this is where a man is talking to a woman and it's almost as though he's auditioning for the role of her boyfriend or her lover — where he's trying to put his best foot forward and make a really good impression to hopefully be chosen by her.
He won't necessarily look like a really desperate guy or anything like that, but energetically, she will feel that he's trying to hopefully be chosen by her.
He's hoping to get a chance with her.
For example, if you're honestly not hoping to be chosen by the woman and there is a silence in the conversation and you honestly feel like you're a valuable man, then if there's a silence, you're not going to worry.
You're going to be talking to her and there might be a silence in the conversation, and you can wait and then either say something if you want to say something, or you wait for her to say something.
Either way, you're not going to be worried that you've just screwed up your chances now because there was a two-second or a five-second pause in the conversation.
Yet a Pick Me Man is going to worry about things like that.
He's going to be hoping that she picks him.
He's hoping to get a chance with her.
So he is worried about things such as a silence in the conversation that he assumes feels really awkward and is ruining his chances with her.
He worries that she might be losing interest in him because of it.
She then notices that he's worried that she might be losing interest.
Yet a man who truly believes in his value isn't going to be worried about that.
When a woman senses that you're not worried about you losing value because there's a silence in the conversation, she actually sees you as higher value.
She sees and senses that you're not panicking, you're not afraid, you're not hoping to be chosen, you're not on your best behavior hoping to get a chance with her.
That makes her feel attracted to you.
She feels magnetically drawn to you because you can only do that if you are emotionally strong.
If a man is emotionally weak — and emotional weakness turns women off, emotional strength attracts women — if a man is emotionally weak and there's a silence like that, women will sense his emotional weakness.
They'll see it when he starts fidgeting.
They'll see it with his eye contact.
They'll pick it up based on how he then approaches the conversation.
If he rushes to say something or if he really tries harder now to impress her more because there seems to be silences happening, so she may be losing interest — all these subtle things go on that women pick up on.
They either feel an increased amount of attraction and interest if you get it right, or a decreased amount of attraction and interest if you mess it up.
It's not something that you can't understand or get right.
You just understood what I was talking about with the silence there.
But that's just one of so many things.
For example, if you don't know, I run the Master Attraction Community.
That's where guys are learning my attraction techniques on how to attract women (Attraction Mastery video lesson series).
They're learning what to say and do.
The guys who are learning that and then applying that are getting amazing results.
We're talking about a member kissing a woman within minutes of meeting her.
Another member sleeping with multiple women multiple days in a row — and that's happened with a number of members.
Another member went out and picked up a woman, and the other woman that he met became his girlfriend.
Another member was giving off a genuinely confident energy that he got from learning The Confident Mindset in the first lesson, and a waitress came over and gave the number of her friend.
Another member had a similar experience where women just felt attracted to him.
The most beautiful women in the place seemed to seek his presence, and he ended up getting two results that night.
This just keeps happening again and again and again for members.
The guys who are learning this stuff and then applying it are experiencing amazing results with women.
So if you're interested in learning my techniques, make sure you check out Master Attraction after watching this video.
As I said at the start of the video, I want to help you save time here — where you're not wasting years or decades of your life.
Something important for you to understand is that every moment of your life that you hesitate, another guy out there is just taking action.
Even though he's not as valuable as you.
He may not be as intelligent as you.
And for example, if you see yourself as a cool guy, he might not be very cool.
He might be quite an ordinary guy, but something that he's doing is that he's giving himself a chance.
Women are attracted to men who are determined.
Women are attracted to men who give themselves a chance in a confident way.
It's not about a man giving himself a chance in a way where he's desperate and he's hoping to get a result.
What really impresses women and makes them feel the edge is when you confidently give yourself a chance and don't give up at the first sign that you may not be able to get a result.
For example, if you're talking to a woman that you find attractive, she won't always make it obvious that she likes you.
In many cases, she'll be friendly, but she won't make it obvious that she wants something sexual or romantic to happen.
In some cases, she may be quite awkward or nervous or anxious.
As a result, she may seem a little bit awkward or tense in the interaction.
She may not be flowing well with the interaction.
But that doesn't mean that you don't have a chance with her.
A lot of women do suffer from anxiety.
They suffer anxiety more than men do.
A lot of men don't realize that.
They think that women are bulletproof, they're perfect, and all women are confident, and it's just men who are awkward and shy and so forth around women.
But women are actually quite nervous and shy and awkward in many cases.
In some cases, you'll talk to a woman and she'll be stuffing up the interaction.
When you walk away, she'll be saying to herself, “Damn it, why did I say that? Or why didn’t I show some more interest?”
So if you want to get results with women, you can't just give up at the first sign of, “Oh well, it seems a bit awkward,” or, “She gave me a certain look,” or, “She didn’t laugh at that joke,” or, “She gave quite a short response there, so I’m just going to give up.”
Instead, you've got to go for it.
You've got to remain confident and move things forward.
In many cases, you then get results with women who you would never have gotten anywhere with if you just gave up in that millisecond or that second moment where you started to feel a little bit awkward.
You gave up.
No.
Don’t give up.
Remain confident.
Understand that women aren't always confident.
Understand as well that some women don't want to make it obvious that they like you because they don't want to open themselves up to a guy who doesn't even like them.
They want to be able to see that you have enough confidence.
You have that masculinity to move things forward, like the traditional and the natural male-female human mating dance.
The man actually moves things forward.
She wants to see that you have that type of masculinity.
She wants to see that you have the confidence to stick in there.
That you're not just going to give up at the first sign of a bit of a challenge or a bit of awkwardness.
In other cases, she wants to see that you're interested enough.
In other cases, she's feeling awkward, she's feeling nervous and anxious.
If you walk away from it, she then feels disappointed.
She thinks, “Damn it. I just lost an opportunity with a guy I like there. Why does this keep happening to me?”
So make sure that you're not being the Passive Guy who is hoping that women are just going to suddenly go against nature, the way that they are wired and turn into more like men and just say, “Hey, give me your number. I'll take you out sometime.”
Don't be waiting for that.
Don't be waiting for women to say, “Wow, you look so great. Give me your number. Let's start dating. You really have a great fashion sense. I want to date you.”
Don't wait for that.
It's not going to happen in 99.99% of cases unless the woman is unattractive, and so on.
Also, make sure that you don't have a Pick Me vibe.
Whether that's really obvious, where, for example, if you're walking through a shopping mall, you feel like you're being watched and you're sort of hoping that women are going to notice you; that's the really obvious one.
And the less obvious one is where you're making statements throughout the conversation and interaction with a woman that suggest you're trying to impress her.
You're hoping that she's going to choose you.
You're reacting to her in a certain way to hopefully show her that you're cool enough to be with her, and then she chooses you.
“Alright, I'll pick you,” sort of thing.
You can't rely on women to pick you.
Some guys think, “Well, just choose women that choose you.”
Well, the women who usually choose you, as you may have experienced, are usually not the ones that you're actually attracted to.
The women that you're really attracted to aren't going to make it that easy.
They want to see that you are able to choose them and not get awkward and give up and walk away if it's not flowing perfectly in every second of the interaction.
Finally, just understand that in many cases you're just one step away from getting the results that you want with women.
Most women that you'll meet are way easier to get with than they seem, or they make themselves out to be, or that most guys assume.
Most guys assume it's going to be very difficult, but the guys who actually give themselves a chance are often surprised.
“Wow, that was quite easy. She just gave me her number.”
“I suggested catching up and she said yes.”
“I moved in for a kiss and we started kissing.”
“I invited her back to my place and she came over to my place and we're having sex.”
It's usually way easier than most guys realize.
But women aren't going to say that to you.
They're not going to make it obvious to you, but they're waiting for you to take on your natural role as a man and make something happen.
- Attraction Mastery video lessons
- Master Attraction Community
- Dan Bacon AI - 24/7 support and advice
