How to Stop Being a Nice Guy and Make Women Want You Sexually
By Dan Bacon, founder of Master Attraction
Have you ever noticed that women don't feel the need to be extra nice to men to hopefully be liked, but men feel the need to be extra nice to women to hopefully be liked?
So what's going on there?
Well, it's a mistake that so many men make that causes women to unnecessarily have the power in the dating scene and then in a relationship.
And that is, the guy looks at her as having what he wants, and he feels like he needs to be extra nice in order to get what he wants.
So what he wants is either sex, respect, affection, love, or all of those things from her.
And he feels like she holds all the power in his mind.
It's 100% up to her whether she's going to give him what he wants or not.
And when a guy becomes a man, he often forgets that as a boy, if he wanted to get something, the way to usually get that was to be nice, to be a good boy, to show that he was doing the right thing, that he had good intentions, that he was going to be a good boy.
And then he would get some candy, or he'd get a toy, or he'd get some praise, or he'd get a hug.
He gets some attention, and so forth.
So what a lot of guys do then, when they're interacting with women that they find attractive is that they're using that boyish strategy of, well, look, I've got to be really nice to this woman and show her that I'm a good guy, and then she's going to give me what I want.
Yet why is it that women don't have to do that to get men to want them sexually?
Why is it that a woman can be quite savage in how she approaches interactions with men, where she can just reject a man, or she can just walk away, or she can show that she's not interested, or she can say that she's not interested?
Why is she able to do that and the guy still wants to have sex with her?
The reason why a woman is able to do that is that I would estimate approximately 95% of men who meet her don't actually know how to attract her sexually, but she is automatically sexually attractive to those men without having to do anything other than be female and look the way that she does.
For example, even just the shape of a woman is enough for most men to say yes to having sex with her.
Now, while a man would prefer to see the woman's face in this photo, he will usually still be able to say yes to sex just by seeing some of her body.
She's a female.
Yep, that looks good.
That's how easy sexual attraction is for women.
So they have that instant attractiveness, they have that instant yes going for them based on them simply looking like a good-looking female or even a decent-looking male.
Most men will look at the woman and say yes in their mind.
Yet what the absolute majority of men do not realise is that women don't feel attracted to men in the same way.
In almost all cases, a woman doesn't have an instant yes in her mind simply based on how the man looks.
Instead, what most women place the most importance on is emotional attractiveness.
And that's something that a lot of men struggle with.
And it's also something that some guys feel is unfair.
Why does a man have to be emotionally attractive for a woman to want him sexually?
But a woman doesn't really need to do anything other than look good and be nice.
So a guy will feel like, why can't a woman just like me, as is, right away...just like I like a woman as is right away?
Guys who have that sort of reaction simply don't understand that if they were one of the very small percentage of men who know how to make women feel emotionally attracted, then they would not only have an advantage over the absolute majority of men, but they would also have an advantage over women.
What happens is that when a man knows how to make a woman feel emotionally attracted to him, then he can actually have the power.
It can be him who is in the position of power and the woman is the one trying to get a treat.
And just to make a clear emotional attractiveness is essentially about how you make a woman feel based on what sort of behaviors and traits you are displaying when you're interacting with her.
So, for example, if you're interacting with a woman and you're displaying confidence, she's going to feel attracted to you, but if you're displaying insecurity, she's not going to feel attracted to you.
That will be an automatic reaction on her part.
She won't have to think about it and consider whether or not she should feel attracted to you.
Women automatically feel some attraction for a man when he is displaying confidence.
Likewise, with what I call emotional masculinity, which essentially means that you are strong no matter what, emotionally, versus emotional fragility, which means that a man is weak.
Women aren't attracted to emotional weakness in men because it makes them feel like they are a man's big sister or a mother figure or like a mentor or teacher in his life.
They want a man who is emotionally stronger than they are.
The next one, emotional independence versus emotional dependence.
So, emotional dependence is essentially neediness.
And a guy will be needy, for example, if he needs a woman to behave in a certain way in order for him to feel confident, to feel good enough, to feel worthy, and so on.
Emotional independence is automatically attractive to women because it allows the woman to instantly realize that, okay, she's not going to have to baby that guy.
She's not going to have to constantly reassure him that she is interested in order for him to feel confident.
He's going to be able to feel confident, happy, and good about himself regardless of how she is behaving or what she's saying.
The next one is self-respect versus a lack of boundaries.
So if you ask a man whether he respects himself, he'll almost certainly say yes and he'll want to be respected.
But when he's interacting with a woman that he finds attractive, she will notice that she's able to get away with certain behavior that he puts up with because he's hoping to get a chance with her.
He's willing to not be treated as well as he wants to, hopefully get a result with, and she then realizes that he doesn't have self-respect.
The second last one, flirting versus neutral.
So if a guy is just being neutral when he's interacting with a woman, there's going to be no sexual vibe.
It's just going to be a neutral conversation, as though she's simply talking to a friend.
And if she likes the guy and he can't flirt with her to create sexual tension, then that's going to be unattractive to her because it suggests to her that a relationship will be boring and flat.
And while the guy might enjoy having sex with her for a few months or a few years, there probably isn't going to be much mutual sexual tension ongoing because the guy doesn't know how to flirt and create that sexual tension.
And finally, untamed energy versus tamed energy.
The majority of men that women come across have a tamed energy around them.
These men are afraid to express who they really are, their dominance, their sexual energy, or their authentic self around the woman and it shows.
Women rarely come across men who have what I call untamed energy.
But when a woman does come across a man like that, she instantly feels attracted and turned on by him.
And the best thing is that if a guy is only able to display a couple of those traits or three or four of those traits, he will get results with most of the women that he meets because the majority of men that a woman meets will display the opposite of what is attractive to women or will just be neutral.
So what an attractive woman experiences is that most guys who meet her would like to have sex with her and many would want a relationship if she gave them a chance.
So she is in the position of power and therefore doesn't feel the need to be extra nice to hopefully get men to like her.
On the other hand, what most men experience is that women aren't automatically attracted to them enough, and they don't know how to make women feel attracted, so they look at women as having all the power.
Yet the secret for men to understand is that when you're able to make women feel emotionally attracted to you, women feel just as much attraction to you as you feel to physically attractive women.
Therefore, you have what the woman wants.
She wants the feeling that she gets when she interacts with you, because you are a man that women find emotionally attractive.
So, the thing is, when you display emotionally attractive traits, women feel it.
And when you can also look at her as just another woman who would happily have sex or a relationship with you, who would really want that, she picks up on that as well.
And what happens then is that you're in the position that most attractive women are in where they don't feel the need to be extra nice to hopefully get men to like them.
And I don't feel the need to be extra nice to hopefully get women to like me.
That's what I began to experience when I figured it out and I started having a lot of options with women, and that's what I've continued to experience ever since.
As a man, you don't have to be the sort of guy who needs to suck up to women, or be on your best behavior and try to do as much as possible to impress her, to hopefully get that thing that you want from her, whether it's sex or a relationship, love, respect and so forth.
You can get that right now.
You can get that immediately and you don't have to put on a nice guy act or try really hard to hopefully get her to react in that way to you.
Instead, she will naturally react to you with strong magnetic feelings of attraction if you are displaying the traits that are important to women, but in almost all cases, are not important to men.
For example, most men do not care if a woman is shy or insecure.
And in many cases, her shyness or delicateness actually makes the man like her more and feel better around her because he feels like more of a man around her.
But women don't want to feel like that around you.
They don't want to feel like they are stronger than you.
They want to feel like you are emotionally stronger than they are.
And when you're able to let a woman sense that you don't have to be Mr. Nice Guy to hopefully get her to like you, because she'll feel attracted to you.
She'll feel sexually attracted.
And as a result of that, you've done enough to impress her.
Anything else that you say now that is kind of cool or interesting is just a bonus.
It's just like when you interact with a woman who is physically attractive, she's done enough.
But if she's just nice now and friendly and says yes, fantastic.
But for some guys, even if a woman is physically attractive and she's not that nice, she's a bit distant, she plays a little bit hard to get, they'll still want to have sex with her because the physical is enough for most men.
Sure, if a man's gonna have a relationship with a woman, he wants her to have a nice personality, to be intelligent, to be easygoing, down to worth, all that sort of great stuff.
But when it comes to sexual attraction, when it comes to that desire that men feel towards women, where you can just look at a woman and say yes right away to having sex with her, she has done enough.
But in almost all cases, a man is not enough.
Just being a man, you actually need to interact with her and create a spark of sexual attraction inside of her by being emotionally attractive.
And when you do that, you unlock women that would never have been interested in you in the past and that you don't have to work hard to try to impress.
She's interested right now, right?
She's feeling it already.
She's feeling attracted to you and she likes you.
And if she also gets the sense that you look at her as just another woman who would happily have sex with you or a relationship with you, but you're not being arrogant about it, then she'll feel magnetically drawn to you.
And in many cases, she'll even feel the urge to chase you and to make it happen.
It's difficult for some guys to understand how that could be possible because they've heard women say, "Oh, that guy's handsome," or "I only want a guy who's good-looking," or "I would only date a guy who's good-looking."
Yet, the reality is that although a woman can feel attracted to a man who is handsome, a woman's attraction is mostly created based on a man's behavioral traits, and this was proven by a recent study.
I'll just read some quotes here from the studies and then explain what it means for you.
"While some stereotypically masculine traits, for example confidence, assertiveness, and facial appearances suggestive of such traits are considered desirable, women view other masculine traits as undesirable, for example, aggressiveness."
Another quote.
"In particular, judgments of confidence were positively correlated with facial attractiveness."
And finally, "Individual participants ' face-based judgments of confidence positively predicted facial attractiveness."
So what that means is that a woman can look at your face and find you more physically attractive if you're actually displaying confidence in your expression.
If she senses that you are a confident guy, this is why.
You may have heard women say something about their boyfriend or husband that essentially went along the lines of "I wasn't initially attracted to him, but once we started talking, I felt a spark, we fell in love, and the rest is history."
And she now sees him as sexy, cute, handsome and so on.
But initially, a woman can look at a man and not find him physically attractive, but then actually find him attractive because he's displaying what is most important to women, which is emotional attractiveness.
And there are so many different traits that you can display to create a feeling of emotional attraction inside of a woman.
And the thing is, regarding confidence, women can sense based on the subtleties of your expressions, whether you are confident or not.
It's very subtle and it comes from your mindset.
You can't fake confidence around almost all women.
They will notice insecurities, self-doubt, and fear in your expressions if you have an insecure, self-doubting mindset, and that will literally make you appear physically unattractive to them.
Yet, when you are a man who can display traits that are emotionally attractive to women, they not only feel emotionally attracted to you, which is the most important thing to women, but they also look at your physical appearance in a more positive light.
From there, as long as you have the awareness to know that you are attractive to women and they are now trying to get with you, the whole game changes.
You no longer have to try to be extra nice to hopefully get a treat instead.
You can be a good guy if you're a good guy, or you can even be a bit of a bad boy and women will want you anyway because of how attractive you are to them.
Better still, with almost all of the women that you meet, they suddenly feel an urge to be extra nice to you, to hopefully get a treat.
You are the thing that they want.
You're in the position of power where they're trying to get with you.
You can honestly look at the woman as just another woman who wants to have sex with you or a relationship with you.
As I said, it's hard for some guys to come to terms with because they truly believe that it's all about looks, because women definitely can feel attracted to a man's looks.
If a man is handsome, it definitely does give him an advantage.
But when you interact with a woman and she senses that you have emotionally attractive traits, which is the most important thing to women, she actually looks at you as being better looking.
She finds you attractive, she wants to be with you.
Now, it's not possible to attract and pick up every woman in the world, don't get me wrong, but as a man, you really can be in the position of power with most of the women that you're meeting, including pretty and beautiful women.
And best of all, it's actually what women want.
It feels so much better for the woman when she looks up to you, respects you, and truly appreciates being with you.
And of course, that feels great for you too.
So, to make it clear and ensure that you understand the way to stop being a nice guy and start making women feel sexually attracted to you and be in the position of power with women, is to know how to make women feel emotionally attracted to you.
You're displaying traits such as confidence, assertiveness, or are using what I call playfully challenging humor.
You might use some floating any number of traits that are emotionally attractive.
It doesn't have to be a lot.
It can be two or three, four or five, anything like that.
And you're going to be so much more attractive than the average guy who is displaying the opposite of emotionally attractive traits.
For example, he's being insecure, he's being passive and he's using some safe humor.
He's not using any humor or he's just being neutral rather than flirting and so on.
So you need to know how to make women feel emotionally attracted to you, which is the most important thing to most women.
And you then need to be able to look at the woman as just another woman who wants to have sex or a relationship with you, because it's either going to be you or women who are going to be in the position of power.
The woman has her automatic attractiveness just being a female that looks good, and most guys are going to want her because of that.
She doesn't really need to do anything else.
It's different for men and women, but as a man who can make women feel emotionally attracted, you actually have the same amount of value compared to a physically attractive woman.
And you'll have even more value in an attractive woman's eyes.
If you can honestly look at her as just another woman who wants to have sex or a relationship with you, and therefore put her in the position where she feels like she wants to turn on her charms and win you over, be nicer to you, make you fall in love with her, and so on.
That's a much better experience for you and her.
By the way, if you enjoyed this video and you want to get exclusive lessons from me that include all of the traits that make women feel sexually and romantically attracted to you, then head over to masterattraction.com.
At Master Attraction, I teach you what to say and do to make women feel sexually and romantically attracted to you, whether you're single or in a relationship.
I only recently opened Master Attraction and here's what members are saying already.
Two of the members of the MAC, that's the Master Attraction Community, which you get access to when you're learning from the lessons, went out to meet women together and this member picked up a cute blonde and it was the first girl that he'd ever picked up at a bar.
Another member went out and used the techniques that he'd been learning just in the first month of the lessons that you'll get and he kissed 6 girls in one night and got 3 phone numbers.
Another couple of members met up and had all sorts of fun with girls all day.
All sorts of things were going on there and three other members caught up and they were approaching non-stop and getting various good results.
They were saying they managed to get a phone number and one of the guys overcame his approach anxiety.
Another guy used the technique that I teach in the first lesson on confidence and it resulted in his yoga instructor really wanting him and him having to basically do nothing but ask her out and he then hooked up with her that night.
A member who is only 5'8 in terms of height has been doing amazingly well since he's been learning the techniques.
And the other weekend he slept with three new women on three different nights, so Friday, Saturday and Sunday night.
And some guys might find that difficult to believe because they simply don't understand what this member now knows and how amazing these attraction techniques are.
But as this member experienced in the bar, some guys were even trying to follow him around and learn from him, but they weren't able to get results because they simply don't understand what he now knows about attraction.
And finally, another guy used the technique that I teach in the first lesson on confidence, and he noticed that women were getting closer to him than usual.
They were showing him interest and giving him what he called the look.
And this is what happens when you use the technique.
Women feel magnetically attracted to you.
And it's taught in the first lesson on confidence at Master Attraction.
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