How to Shoot Your Shot With a Woman (Without Getting Rejected)

Most guys don't have a problem with WANTING to shoot their shot with a woman.

The problem is that when they eventually attempt it, they often do it in a way that almost guarantees rejection.

For example: They either come across as too nervous, too serious, too needy, or too unsure of themselves.

Then when she says no, they assume the rejection happened because they aren't good-looking enough for her.

Yet, in most cases, it wasn't about his looks.

It was simply the way he attempted to shoot his shot with her.

So, I am going to teach you the right way to do it.

Importantly, the exact same principle applies when you are SINGLE or in a RELATIONSHIP with a woman.

Whether you're trying to attract a new woman, re-attract an ex, or keep the spark alive with your girlfriend or wife, the way you attempt to move things forward has a big impact on how attracted she feels.

When you understand how women think and what they positively respond to when it comes to men, you'll discover that a small change in your approach can completely change her response.

What You Say is Very Important When Shooting Your Shot

Imagine two guys are interested in the same woman.

The first guy says:

"Can I take you out sometime?"

The second guy says:

"We should grab a coffee sometime this week."

Which do you think is going to be more attractive to the woman?

The difference seems small in terms of what he is saying.

Yet psychologically, the two guys create two completely different experiences for the woman.

The first sounds like he's asking for permission and like she has all the power and value.

The second sounds like he's confidently offering her an opportunity and sees himself as at least equal in value to her, if not higher.

That kind of self-confidence is very attractive and important to women.

The same principle applies in relationships.

A man who is always waiting for his girlfriend or wife to decide what happens next sexually, or romantically, will gradually lose some of the self-confidence that she initially felt attracted to.

He will notice her losing interest over time and won't know what to do about it.

On the other hand, a man who confidently moves things forward by presenting OPPORTUNITIES will naturally maintain the woman's attraction over time.

Stop Asking for Permission

Whether you're meeting a woman for the first time, trying to get an ex back or you're already in a relationship, one of the biggest mistakes men make is putting the woman in the position of deciding whether he's good enough.

When meeting new women and trying to get a date, asking for permission sounds like this:

• Can I take you out sometime?

• Can I take you out to dinner?

• Are you looking for a boyfriend?

• Are you free this week?

In a relationship, it often sounds like:

• What do you want to do?

• Is there anything you feel like doing?

• Where do you want to go?

• Do you want to have sex tonight?

None of those questions are necessarily bad on their own.

The problem is when they become your default way of moving things forward because you hope that a woman will answer the way you want and then essentially lead the interaction, or relationship for you.

Women hate being in that position because it makes them feel like a mother figure in your life, or like she has more power and you are more like the woman and her like the man.

So, instead of going down a path that will lead to rejection or a breakup, you should confidently suggest what the two of you should do.

For example:

"We should grab a coffee sometime."

"We should catch up this week."

"Let's grab a bite to eat sometime."

Or, if you're already together:

"Let's head down to that new restaurant on Friday."

"We should go away for the weekend."

"I've got an idea. Let's do this..."

"Come here" and then draw her into a hug with you. Build some sexual tension and kiss her, or just start spooning her in bed at night and present a sexual opportunity by beginning to turn her on with touch without saying anything, or asking her anything. 

Notice the difference.

You're not asking for permission.

You're confidently presenting an opportunity and providing some direction.

Women find that so much more attractive than feeling like they have to lead or decide on everything.

Women Prefer a Man Who Moves Things Forward

Many men worry that being more direct by shooting their shot may seem controlling, too forward, or too bossy to a woman.

It doesn't.

Women prefer a man who isn't afraid to take the lead with her, or in life and move something forward when the situation calls for it.

That doesn't mean making every decision for her, or being bossy or domineering.

Instead, it simply means confidently moving things forward instead of hoping she'll do it for you.

This is one of the reasons women often describe real men as making them feel "swept off their feet."

He's not hesitating.

He's not asking for approval.

He's confidently creating opportunities for the interaction, or relationship to move forward.

Whether that's asking for her number, arranging the first date, rekindling things with an ex, or suggesting something fun for the two of you to do as a couple, the fundamental attractive quality of being assertive and taking the lead is exactly the same.

Don't Make it Too Serious

Another common mistake when a guy attempts to shoot his shot with a woman, is asking a woman out to 'dinner' too early.

Dinner often feels like a serious romantic date.

It can make a woman feel as though you're already imagining her as being your future girlfriend or wife and want to get her to commit to a relationship, before you've even spent much time together.

So, something more casual works better with almost every woman you will meet.

Something like...

A coffee.

A drink.

A bite to eat.

A casual catch-up.

Those options feel relaxed and allow attraction to develop between you and her without unnecessary pressure of getting into a serious relationship as a result of having 'dinner' together.

Don't Accidentally Make Her Play Hard to Get

Many women only play hard to get because men unintentionally put them in that position.

For example, when a guy nervously asks:

"Can I take you out sometime?"

She often feels she shouldn't say yes too quickly because she doesn't want to seem too easy.

So she says:

"I'm not sure."

"Maybe."

"I'll let you know."

"I don't know if I'm looking for anything."

Yet, if the exact same guy confidently said:

"We should catch up this week."

She would often happily agree.

The difference wasn't her level of attraction for him.

Instead, it was his approach.

This is why it's important to know how to attract women, but it's also important to know how to move things forward correctly so you don't get unnecessarily rejected. 

From a Woman's Perspective, You're Shooting Your Shot Long Before Asking for Her Number

Some guys think that shooting their shot only happens when they ask for a woman's number, or ask her out on a date.

Women don't see it that way.

From her perspective, you've already started shooting your shot the moment you confidently begin talking to her.

Continuing the conversation is part of it.

Flirting is part of it.

Creating a relaxed, playful vibe is part of it.

Getting her number is simply the final step.

The same principle applies in a relationship.

Every time you confidently initiate flirting, create a romantic or sexual moment between you and her, initiate affection, or move things toward sex, you're continuing to shoot your shot with her.

How to Start a Conversation Naturally

Many men overcomplicate the process of approaching women by assuming that they need an amazing pickup line.

You don't.

If you're at a market, you might simply ask her for her opinion on something you're about to buy (e.g. what she thinks of the tomatoes she's looking at and whether she has tried them).

If you're at university, you might say:

"Hey, I've seen you around a few times. I'm Dan. What's your name?"

Simple.

Confident.

Relaxed.

You're giving her an opportunity to talk to you without putting pressure on either of you.

Once the conversation begins, attraction will then begin to develop as long as you are displaying non-physical traits that trigger attraction inside of women.

Most Men Never Even Try

One of the biggest surprises for men is realizing how little competition there actually is for the women they want because most guys NEVER even try to shoot their shot.

Lots of men do notice and look at attractive women.

Yet, only a tiny percentage actually approach them.

Many men also simply stare at women, or check them out.

Some hope she'll make the first move because of how he looks, how he's dressed, or that he's doing better in life (he assumes she will sense that and then want to meet him).

Other guys convince themselves that she'll reject them, so they don't even try.

Meanwhile, a tiny percentage of confident men just introduce themselves, create some feelings of attraction inside the woman and then get a phone number, kiss, date, or have sex that day or night. 

Unlike most guys, they are willing to do more than just LOOK at women.

They are willing to shoot their shot.

Shoot Your Shot the Right Way

If you've mostly been getting rejected by women you like up until now, don't automatically assume women aren't interested in you.

In many cases, they're simply reacting to your approach rather than rejecting you as a man.

The same applies if attraction has faded in a relationship.

Often, it isn't because she suddenly stopped loving you or because you've become physically unattractive.

Instead, it's because the attractive behaviors that originally drew her to you have gradually been replaced by hesitation, uncertainty, or insecurity.

Sometimes the difference between rejection and a phone number, or between a relationship feeling flat and becoming exciting again, isn't your looks.

It's simply the way you shoot your shot.

I know this personally because I used to get rejected and when I learned how to trigger attraction and shoot my shot correctly, I ended up being with 100s of women before settling down. 

Here's my story (with some photos of some of the women I've been with).